This morning, like many others, I find myself feeling like I have to rush to get ready and head out the door to do something. I don't really know what. But something. Obviously I'm not that convicted about it because here I sit, still in my pajamas playing Cars with Ryan and having a late breakfast. I don't really want to rush to get out of the house. So where does this nagging come from? To be like everyone else. To feel I have to get myself looking like I have it together and drag my son places he doesn't care to go. Because, happiness for him is sitting for hours playing with Lightning McQueen and all his friends recreating scenes and races, and showing me all the stuff he knows and loves.
No one has ever said to me, "I can't believe you don't do arts and crafts with your kids, or take them to the park each day." I think it's just one of those things where we look around and see what others are doing and think we are less than if we don't do the same things. But don't worry, we aren't at home every single day. We head to the park, when it's not 100 degrees and go fun places. :) But not to the point where I feel like I'm rushing around. When I start to feel that way, I stop and think to myself, why am I rushing? Usually, I realize it is because I feel like I have to be like someone else. So I allow my to world stop and remember what I'm really doing. I'm savoring these precious years with my son and so we play.
So many times I try to mold my life into what others are doing, but we are all so very different. There are mothers who work full time and make every moment they do have with their children count. And there are plenty of kids and moms that do enjoy that routine of getting up early and heading different places not feeling one bit rushed and that's wonderful. But I have to remember that's not me. I can stay here and let Ryan enjoy his little world that he loves so much.
So today, like most others, I'm going to lounge in my pjs and enjoy the moments I have with my precious 3 year old. We may head to the pet store or do something fun in the real world. But mostly I'm going to do what he loves most and not feel bad about that.
So just like I shouldn't feel bad that I'm not "out in the world doing something" no working mother should feel bad for not being at home. The ones who enjoy being out all day should do it. We are all wired differently and in different seasons. I just have to remember to accept and love mine and be me. So let's enjoy being the mom's God created us to be and stop wasting time and energy thinking we have to be something else. Whatever brings you and your kids happiness; do it.
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